This Detox Diet Cured My Cancer, and Other Reasons The Government Should Vet Scientists

When I was first diagnosed with cancer, my doctors insisted I undergo surgery and radiation. But something about it seemed wrong to me. “Isn’t radiation bad?” I thought. My friend, Charla, who is studying homeopathy, assured me it was. And that same kind of critical questioning of establishment “science” is one of the many reasons I support Donald Trump for vetting all government scientific organization’s tweets before they can be disseminated to the public.


Look, scientists do a lot of good for the world, but I don’t need their “fact-based” political agenda shoved down my throat. I have cancer!


Rather than undergo invasive procedures to cure my cancer, Charla suggested I try a detox diet to free myself of sugar addiction and rid my body of heavy metals. Using an online quiz, she diagnosed me with FLC syndrome (where you “feel like crap”). Thank goodness she did, or else I would have been paying a lot of money for treatments, just because some “educated doctors” said I needed them. I know a savvy businessman like Donald Trump would appreciate this common sense solution that didn’t involve massive spending on elitist doctors and their broken system.



Since just three weeks on the diet, I now know, due to the scent and color of my urine, that my cancer has completely disappeared. Doctors don’t believe me, but that’s because their whole world would come crashing down if they knew the “science” they clung to was a lie. Do you still think climate change is real now?! I sure don’t, but that’s because no official scientific organization has the means to tell me about it anymore.


Seriously, you wouldn’t believe this diet!


Like Charla always says, food is medicine. You don’t need a fancy degree to understand that you are what you eat, and I was putting poison into my body on a daily basis. If you cut out all sugars (except for chocolate—what’s life without treats?) your body can reset to a natural cancer-free state. Similarly, if scientists would stop seeing the world as broken and start appreciating its bountiful resources, we’d all be better off. Where’s the study that celebrates how warm it is outside?!


After a couple of days of cutting out toxic foods, I could start to feel a burning sensation in my abdomen where the tumor was clearly healing itself. It was sometimes healing itself so intensely that I couldn’t walk. But I didn’t mind, because I knew I was getting better. If there’s one thing I do trust, it’s my own intuition which is never wrong.


Donald Trump understands that our government has suffered from a too-many-cooks situation with scientists for too long. We would be better off with one good scientist, like Dr. Oz, or Ben Carson, or The Doctors, leading the way to a saner government. We really don’t need all these other scientists pushing their political agenda on me when I have enough deeply rooted opinions and beliefs already.


My doctor keeps calling me to try to schedule treatment, but I always run his opinions by Charla first, who I trust. Similarly, I would like our EPA scientists to run their thoughts by the Trump administration, who I also trust. They have the guts and the will to determine if there is solid logic and no political agenda to their so-called “facts”, rather than just some fad studies that everyone is making a big deal out of just to be on-trend with the latest science. To that I say, no thank you!