The Next Olivia Rodrigo? This Girl Just Got Dumped

Watch out, world – we think we just found the next Olivia Rodrigo! In an exciting story out of Sacramento, CA, 28-year-old Lauren Jacobs has just been dumped.


“I was devastated when he broke things off. It came out of nowhere. I thought he loved me,” says Lauren of her ex, Sam, who she dated for two years. “I don’t know how I can ever recover from this.”


Wow. This is the kind of amazing stuff that only happens once or twice in a generation.


When asked how she has been coping with being broken up with by someone, Lauren said: “I’m just trying to distract myself. I’ve been listening to a lot of Fearless. It’s my comfort album at the moment. I also recently took up the piano and it’s been cathartic learning to play it.”


Um, somebody book this bitch a recording studio before the pain and grief goes away!


After seeing how successful Sour was, Lauren’s mother, Sharon Jacobs, is encouraging her to share her unique experience with the world.


“It’s just absolutely shocking to me that my daughter was dumped,” explains Sharon. “My husband and I were so busy trying so hard to make sure that Lauren lived a struggle-free life and were just so blindsided by this. Anyway, she should absolutely capitalize on this while she still looks sort of young.”


It’s true! We have absolutely no idea what it’s like to be dumped, and need to know specifics!


“I’m just really still in shock,” Lauren said. “I think I need to take some time alone and learn to love myself again.”


No thanks, Lauren!