It’s indisputable: Fashion trends always make a resurgence, even long after they’ve gone out of style. And since the fashion powers-that-be who decide what is hot each season are certifiably insane, here are the hippest trends that you’re going to make fun of until you end up rocking them so hard in about a month. After all, there’s a super thin line between fucking hip and fucking crazy!
Seriously? Clogs? Forget about how clompy they make your feet look, the word “clog” is inherently unattractive and still was even when they were in style. You wouldn’t be caught dead in them, at least until next month when you remember how comfy your feet were in 1998. Plus all of your friends are sporting them suddenly, and people are even wearing them to fashion week? It wouldn’t hurt to get one pair that you will soon be wearing every day for the rest of the summer because wow clogs are amazing!!
What is this garbage? A #TBT of your mom? Is this a fucking joke? If you see a friend wearing these patchwork monstrosities, you will spend every waking hour relentlessly teasing them about their sad, home-schooled-by-hippies-in-the-desert look. That is until you try them on ironically and realize how well they hug your hips without sliding down in the back. Plus you suddenly feel fun and quirky! It’s funny how patchwork pants looked horrible on everyone else last month, but great on you today!
Sure, you’d be happy to wear netting if you were at a literal rave in 1997. But since you’re a human with self-worth and dignity, you’ll happily continue wearing your regular clothes. And then exactly one month after you call your friend a “the leg lamp in A Christmas Story” for wearing it, you’ll try on the neon net top of your dreams that perfectly fits your body and flatters your abs. You’ll never look back at the time you spent ridiculing your best friend because none of that was real and netting is everything right now!
You still have a tie dye t-shirt from camp in the 90s that you wear around the house, which was also embarrassing in the 80s but not in the 70s. Why would you even consider wearing one in public? After you laugh at the gutter punks for their fashion faux-pas, you’ll remember the comfy-yet-sexy way the soft tie-dyed fabric clings to your curves. So maybe try on this one tie-dye dress, then tie-dye every article of clothing in your closet. Before you know it, you’ll be feeling just as hot as you thought you looked 20 years ago!
Your “fashion” friends might have been right to rock these looks before they hit the mainstream. But keep your coolness and be sure not to admit it to them, cause you’ll still have a lot of making fun of to do before low-rise flares are officially mainstream again!