The Broke Girl’s Guide to Applying for Welfare


Magazines can make it seem like everyone has thousands of dollars to spend on designer clothes. But really, a lot of us can’t even afford food or shelter! If you’re a little strapped for cash, to the point where you’re afraid you might not make it through the winter, check out this handy guide to applying for welfare! Remember: You don’t have to be Olivia Palermo to not die of starvation.


In the state of New York, eligible families may receive up to 60 months of federally funded cash assistance under the Temporary Aid to Needy Families Program (TANF).

That’s SO many months!!! Now, if only they could pay for your Netflix subscription — ha! Beware though — this one is only for families, so you may need to have a kid first. Guess Mom was right! Ugh!


Single individuals without children may receive benefits under the New York State Safety Net Program. 

Single and ready to mingle? More like single and ready to receive benefits under the New York State Safety Net Program! Just because you’re still waiting for Mr. Right doesn’t mean you don’t want to know where your next meal is coming from. You don’t need ANYONE to complete you! But you do need food to survive.



Eligible clients receiving temporary cash assistance must engage in work activities.

You might not have an Hermès to carry your work essentials, but that doesn’t mean you don’t need to work! Work can be fulfilling and fun— and it can be for you, too! Just find something that speaks to you, and fast! Otherwise, you’re on your own. You’re really on your own, now.


NYC residents may apply for a one-time emergency grant, also called a “One Shot”, when an unforeseen circumstance prevents the applicant from meeting an expense.

Kickin’ it in the city? You go, girl! If that medical bill threw you for a life-changing and demoralizing loop, you may be eligible for a “One Shot.” Just one of the many advantages of living in New York City, this program can help you out if you’re in a tight spot. Plus, all the cool street performers are free!


Well, there you have it, chickadees. There’s no need to spend a fortune to look well fed this fall. Follow these tips and you’ll be on your way to the help from the government you need!