STUDY: Buy That Top Because You Ain’t Taking That Money To The Grave With You, Honey

A study released this week by the Economic Policy Institute indicated that you ain’t taking that money to the grave with you, so you better just buy that top you’ve been thinking about, honey.


“Consumer choices and the flow of cash have always been topics of high interest in the field,” said lead researcher Dr. Justine Selleck. “But our initial findings from this study show that you ain’t gotta worry about that when you’re dead. That shirt is bomb and looks amazing on you so quit wasting time and get it, baby.”


The study was praised for its consideration of other, arguably more practical economic investments that you could have made, including starting a retirement account, paying more than the monthly minimum on your student loan debt, or contributing to your 401K. But emerging results still pointed to the fact that you get one little life to live on this Earth, so spend your limited time looking hot as hell, girl!


Despite the study being performed by a reputable think tank, some critics have continued to voice their disagreement on its applications.


“It’s worth speculating that the small incremental increase in happiness and confidence as a result of wearing that shirt isn’t totally justified by its price, and practical fiscal spending should be practiced more often than it currently is,” said Charles Erick, a senior lecturer in microeconomics at Georgetown University. “But to that end, you only live once!”


But Dr. Selleck insists that her study is comprehensive and accurate.



“We trust our science,” said Dr. Selleck. “And our thorough research has given us strong indications that you should do you to the fullest.”