How to Treat Everyone as Your Equal Even Though You Have a Mask Chain

While we all have differences, and some of those differences make us better or worse than other people, it’s so important to treat everyone with dignity and respect. From your closest friends to those you fleetingly interact with throughout the day, people feel and appreciate when you regard them as a valid and worthy being, particularly when they don’t deserve it. Here’s how to be the bigger person and treat everyone as your equal even though you have a sick mask chain and they don’t.


Make eye contact.

Slowing down and looking someone in the eye is a great way to imbue your interaction with a sense of shared humanity and false equality. When you order your latte or hold a door open for a neighbor, don’t be afraid to hold their gaze, and while you do, pretend you don’t see the shame and envy in their eyes over the fact that you have a fashionable and functional mask chain that elevates your entire look and basically makes you a renowned influencer IRL. You are still a person of the people.


Put yourself in their sad shoes.

Some people’s masks wear them, and that’s heartbreaking but true. Think about how you wanted to be treated before you owned a mask chain: the tool and accessory that separates the normals from the risk-takers, tastemakers, Euphoria teens, the feminist small online business models, and the unfathomably hot. It’s hard to remember back to when you were that person, but you probably wanted to be seen as a human being, so give others the kindness of an empathetic thought or two before it becomes too uncomfortable to bear. God, your mask chain fucking rules and you’re being totally cool about it.



See their potential.

In order to pretend other people are your equals, try seeing their potential instead of seeing them as they are. Your dad, your best friend, your gynecologist (who hopefully are all separate people) aren’t aimless wastes of space, they’re just humans who haven’t gotten a mask chain yet. You could get mask chains for them, but that’s really something one has to come to on their own time when they’re ready to look amazing.


You may have transformed an inconvenient and bothersome fact of a global pandemic into yet another opportunity to be a style icon, but that doesn’t mean you’re better than other people. Kidding! Obviously, it does mean that, but with these tips, no one will know that you know how much better you are. Thank you for all you do, queen!