How I Reject Binaries but Also I’m A Top

I’m not the first to say that I completely reject binaries: They’re limiting, repressive, and don’t reflect our true nature as humans in a complex world. So believe me when I say that the world would be a better place if we got rid of the notion altogether.


But just to be clear, if anybody asks, I am 100% a top. And if that person is a bottom, please let me know.


I see the world as a series of spectrums, where one can inhabit one end of a spectrum on one day, and a totally different one on another. That’s what’s so beautiful about being human. Our bodies and minds change throughout our lives, and we should all feel unlimited freedom in expressing our identity, no matter how much it evolves. I, personally, don’t inhabit any particular gender presentation or adhere to a single worldview, but just to be clear I was born a top and I will die a top. I will always be a top.


Even if it’s your birthday.


And sure, words themselves are designed to reinforce binaries, and I reject that limiting language as well. Which is why I sometimes describe myself as “the person who does the fucking” or, in some contexts, “closed for business,” or say, a “top” or an “unambiguously dom top.”



Now let me be clear, if you identify as bisexual or as anything else, I fully respect that, I just reject the idea of defining myself in that way. I am a fluid, dynamic, ever-changing force of energy that simply cannot be defined by words. Unless that word is the opposite of bottom – in which case, you know my whole deal now. DM me if you’re interested.