As hospitals fill with COVID-19 cases and become increasingly risky for anyone in need of medical care, hospitals across the country are urging pregnant women to give birth in the Ubers they’re taking to the delivery room as much as possible.
“Based on several studies we’ve conducted in the past five weeks,” says Dr. Henrietta L’Engle, “We now know that it’s in women’s best interest to have their babies while en route to have their babies.”
“Ubers, Lyfts, doesn’t matter,” she added. “Any car service, really – just pop the kid out in the back seat and you’re good to go.”
“I was planning on having a C-section at my local hospital,” says new mother Angela Parker. “But upon my doctor’s recommendation, I just asked my Uber driver to take a couple extra loops around the block, and out she came. It was a win-win for everyone.”
“There are a few reasons why we’re advising expectant mothers in this way,” said Dr. L’Engle. “First, we want to give these women the opportunity to avoid a major medical bill. But more importantly, we’re empowering mothers with the ability to force their partners to film the next viral Twitter video.”
“Also, the hospital is filled with a highly contagious virus. So just try to get it all over with before you get in the door.”