Cult Leader Hoping Group Can Rise Fast Enough for Hulu Docuseries in Her Lifetime

Deep in the rural community of Ketchum, ID, rising cult leader Samantha Dawkins is doing everything she can to ensure her up-and-coming sex cult rises to prominence fast enough for a Hulu docuseries before she inevitably dies in a gunfight with federal officers defending her ranch.

 

“I think what we’ve got going here is really special,” says Dawkins, as she puts on her ceremonial garb for the evening ritual. “If the right journalist gets ahold of this, we could have a 12-episode series, and if we’re lucky – maybe even a musical?”

 

Dawkins just hopes she can attract enough vulnerable young people into her “intentional community” to gain some serious buzz before her inevitable downfall.

 

“Until then, I’m not taking any risks. No private planes, no suicide pacts,” adds Dawkins. “Not until we’ve got at least a pilot order on deck.”

 

What started as a “self-help networking group” has already quickly spawned into a cohort of polygamists looking to tap into the power of the Universe in order to ultimately destroy American democracy.

 

“We started out pretty small, you know, just a few of us having sex on a ranch in the middle of nowhere,” says He-ron, another cult member. “But it’s been amazing watching our group go from a bunch of free-loving hippies to a full-on militarized force, prepared to kill if anyone threatens our way of life. It would really make for amazing television.”

 

Samantha and her close cohort of advisors are doing everything they can to make sure their cult is not just generically insane.

 

“I’m just hoping we can find something that sets us apart from the other cults,” Dawkins says. “And if our downfall becomes a metaphor for the entire American empire? Even better.”

 

 

In spite of the challenges that lay ahead, such as an increasing police presence around their property and millions of dollars in back taxes, Dawkins knows this is all part of what could be a compelling Hulu original series with the potential to captivate millions.

 

“What can I say? It’s just one thing on my bucket list.”