In a developing story out of Vancouver, Canada, your 27-year-old boyfriend Matt Wainscott has started going to therapy, but sources say he’s doing so incorrectly.
“After weeks of me raving to my boyfriend about the benefits of therapy, Matt finally said he made his first appointment,” you told reporters. “I was ecstatic at first, but now I’m starting to worry at the changes I’m seeing in him.”
“Everyone knows there’s one specific way to be emotionally well and happy, and one way for therapy to be successful for people,” you said. “And let me just say, therapy is not turning Matt into the person I specifically had in mind when he said he was interested in personal growth.”
According to reports, you had imagined that this therapist would sit your boyfriend down to help him see the light, and that they would be explaining to him why you were right all along about everything you’ve ever disagreed on.
Sources say you also assumed that your boyfriend would be spending therapy sessions focusing exclusively on the issues you saw in him and was hoping he would “fix,” such as matching your personal style of expressing emotions, or dealing with conflict in the exact way you like to deal with it.
However, witnesses report that does not seem to be happening.
“I’m spending therapy learning about my own needs,” Matt said. “Such as my struggles to communicate my desires, as well as some lingering issues with my parents. It’s been great, and my partner has been so supportive as well.”
Yesterday, sources said you were stunned into silence when Matt began using therapy jargon to advocate for personal needs which were independent of what you wanted.
When you asked him to share any realizations he’s had from therapy, he said, “I have to advocate for my need to process things at my own pace, and share with you when it feels safe for me to do so. I hope you’ll join hands with me as I walk down this path.”
“Where did you learn to talk like that?” you responded. “Ugh, this is all wrong.”
“I love you, and I hear you,” Matt said. “I also often need more space for self-regulation, and I am learning that it’s my responsibility to advocate for that need.”
Although your relationship has improved, sources say you have concluded that this must all be some kind of sick joke.
“Therapy is bullshit,” you said. “It’s fake. It doesn’t work. I want my non-communicative boyfriend back.”