6 Strangers at Macaroni Grill Who Don’t Have Your Back

Darren, 23

Darren’s the kind of “sensitive” artist who would rather cover his paper tablecloth with green Crayola-crayon drawings of dragons than join the human rights battle of his time. Lost in his fantasies, he barely notices you, a suburban Joan of Arc standing before a blazing wood oven as you cry, “You just lost your best customer!”