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30-Year-Old Man Decides It’s Finally Time to Start Taking Dating 23-Year-Olds Seriously

‘Don’t Let Politics Affect Friendships,’ Says Guy’s Girl

How to Do Affirmations Without Feeling Like a Beautiful Powerful Loser

Donald Trump Nominates Movies as Secretary of Education

Donald Trump Nominates Plastic Six-Pack Rings as Head of the EPA

Woman With No Savings Decides to Go to Europe

How to Have People Over Even Though That Means They’re Going to See All Your Stuff

Dog Vibes! Woman Eats All Her Meals out of the Same Bowl

Fuck! Leaving Twitter No Longer Enough to Get Away From Elon Musk

QUIZ: Did You Sleep Weird or Is It the First Semblance of Back Pain That Will Plague You for Life?

Woman Treats Self by Finally Cleaning Her Water Bottle

This Woman Would Have a Balanced Diet if She Didn’t Have to Wash Produce

Woman Living on Takis and Zyn Pouches Alarmed by Lack of Energy

DUDE CORNER: Relax It’s Not Going to Be That Bad

Woman Who Bought Herself Flowers on a Whim Now Suspicious That She Did It out of Guilt

Woman Spends Week Comforting Men in Her Life About the Tragic Loss of Her Rights

Woman Gives Post-Election Pep Talk to IUD

Mayor Adams Relieved to No Longer Be the Most Corrupt Leader in Nation

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