Author Archives for Madeline Goetz

‘I’m Fully Crashing Out,’ Says Woman Experiencing Mild Anxiety

Red Light Therapy? This Woman Ran a Red Light Just to Feel Something

Woman’s Tote Bag Weighs 750 Pounds

Nice! Woman’s Wedding Photo Dump Does Not Include Single Shot of Groom

Why I’m Picking a Fight With Someone Who Already Agrees With Me on 99% of Issues

Weaponized Incompetence? Boyfriend Not Professional Photographer

Saint? Man Being Nice to Someone He Doesn’t Find Attractive

Woman Plays Reality TV While She Sleeps to Improve Her Arguing Skills

Aesop’s Fable? This Aesop Bottle Is Filled With Generic Hand Soap

Woman Loves Having Figurines Until It’s Time to Dust

Uh Oh! Living Vicariously Through Friend’s Budding Romance Not Fun Anymore

Sweaty Woman Walking Into Office Turns Into Solid Block of Ice

Cool! 5’8” Boyfriend Doubles as Bag Charm

Relatable! Dog Rewarded With Treat for Simply Going Outside

How to Relax Even Though You Used to Be the Kid Who Power-Walked Their Tube Through the Lazy River

STEM in Woman? This Woman Swallowed the Cherry Stem She Was Trying to Knot

I LIVED IT: I Didn’t Know My Pants Showed Moisture Like That

Smart! Woman Uses Entire Box of Bandaids on Feet Before Putting on Flats

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