Author Archives for Caroline Hanes

‘I Don’t Trust AI,’ Says Woman Who Trusts $4 Bikini Bottom

Damn! Notification Was Loving Message From Friend Instead of Amazon Delivery Update

‘But I Was the Birthday Girl,’ Says Woman Charged With 14 Felonies

Woman Hires TaskRabbit to Make Small Talk With TaskRabbit

How to Remember to Go to Work Even Though There’s No Partiful

Study Finds Woman Who RSVP’d With ‘FUCK YES’ Has 70% Chance of Canceling

Study Finds You Can Still Get Into Heaven if You Call Your Sister a Bitch

‘I Would Never Raise An iPad Baby,’ Says iPad Adult Woman

Wow! This Woman Is So in Tune With Her Cycle She Knows When She’s Actively Bleeding

Woman Receiving Call From Friend Unaware That It Is a To-Do List Item

‘If Only They Knew,’ Thinks Woman in Matching Bra-Underwear Set Crying in Public

How to Ride an Elevator With Someone Without Asking Them to Push You up Against the Wall and Kiss You Like You’ve Never Been Kissed Before

Weird! Smartest Friend Pushing for Trivia Night

Woman Who Doesn’t Have Time to Call Grandparents Wrapping Up Fourth Season of ‘Love Is Blind’

Relatable! Bank Collapses

Newborn Wondering If This Tit Has Oat Milk