You Are More Than Your Lookalike American Girl Doll

Your custom-made American Girl Doll was perfect—your own little mini-me. She had adorable, symmetrical features, and eye, skin, and hair colors that vaguely resembled yours. It was easy to build your life around something so permanent, so seemingly specific to you. Your shared characteristics defined you, which is why it might be difficult to find the “you” that’s not a reflection of an American Girl doll. Here’s how to start seeing yourself as more than just your pricey plastic twin.


Dress Yourself in a Wildly Different Way

You and your look-alike American Girl Doll used to love to wear matching outfits. What could be better than wearing the same overall dress as your little twinsie? Answer: Looking like yourself. Wear something edgy. You want to move past those tea parties you used to host together? Buy a nude spandex jumpsuit and combat boots. Wear them home to Thanksgiving. Stare your former special friend down. When you start dressing in a way that would make your first pal shield her little plastic eyes in horror, you’ll know you’re moving in the right direction. It might be hard, but you both need to start forming your own identities.



Think About Sex More

Nothing says “growing up” like thinking about sex. Stop trying to keep pace with your prudish American Girl Doll. Remember when you both watched that 7th Heaven episode about the importance of waiting until marriage? She would have all about that life, if she could talk. And, as her faithful fellow pea in a pod, so were you. But you are an adult now, and you are more than her lookalike human. Think about sex! Weird sex! You are on your way to leaving your American Girl Doll behind.



Own Your Career

Your look-alike American Girl Doll and you always planned on becoming doctors when you grew up. You even had matching stethoscopes! How adorable. But now, you must burn them. Embrace your social media marketing job with full force. Do not regret this betrayal. Sure, you made her promises, under the sheets, while sharing a box of graham crackers, but now you have to look out for you, got it? Look at me. Do you understand? Throw away that doll!


It might be hard, but you are capable of seeing yourself as more than your $116 identical doll friend (she’s worth more if you’ve managed to keep her in the box all this time). Remember, you are a strong individual who needs to destroy anything that holds you back. Trust me, she’ll thank you one day when she learns to ditch that jumpsuit and pursue her modeling dreams. See? You’re holding her back, too!