Revlon Just Introduced a Lipstick for Frantically Writing Equations on a Window After Being Hit With a Big Idea

In a move toward inclusivity and representation of geniuses, Revlon has just introduced a lipstick for frantically writing equations on a window after being hit with a big idea.


“At Revlon, we strive to create high-quality cosmetics for women on the go,” says spokesperson Alison Trier. “With the new Revlon Ultra Matte Breakthrough lipstick, we’ve crafted a shade, finish, and applicator that understand the answers to once thought unsolvable mathematical and/or scientific problems don’t always come at convenient times or settings.”


“Also, you can put it on your lips,” adds Trier.


The Breakthrough comes in three different shades, Eureka!, You Do The Math, and Fibonacci’s Secret, all of which are pretty much red.


“No matter what equation you’re feverishly scribbling on a nearby window, there’s a shade that’s perfect for you in this collection,” says Trier. “And we’ll be there from the breakthrough to the awards dinner honoring what your achievement means to the field.”



And members of the target demographic for the new maquillage are just as enthusiastic.


“We’re seeing more and more women in science, technology, engineering, and mathematics,” says Dr. Jada Howard. “And it’s time our cultural understanding of those fields mirror their increased internal diversity.”


“It may come as no shock to see a put-together female chemist or classical logician, but what about the unkempt, wild geniuses?” Dr. Howard adds. “Can you picture a woman with a crazed look in her eye, frenetically writing all over a window, unresponsive to those standing behind her asking what’s going on? I hope you can. Because she’s out there, and Revlon is giving her the tools and representation she deserves.”


Revlon says they hope and believe that a tube of Ultra Matte Breakthrough will one day become a historical artifact, imbued with significance from the work of the brilliant woman who uses it to alter the course and scope of humankind’s knowledge.


“Women are intellectual giants,” says Trier. “And it’s time our lipstick caught up.”