I Only Wear Mascara, But Not Where You’d Think

When I was younger, I used to wear a ton of makeup. I wouldn’t leave my house without a full face of foundation, contouring, blush…the works! But it was exhausting, not to mention terrible for my skin. That’s why recently I decided to just focus on skin health, and pare down my makeup habit to the bare essentials. Now I just run out the door wearing nothing but mascara, so that I can highlight my features instead of covering my flaws.


But no, it’s not where you’d think.


Since I stopped wearing foundation, my acne has cleared up and my skin looks much better. Turns out, wearing makeup just meant that I needed to wear even more makeup to fix the damage it was doing to my skin! Now the only product that goes on my skin is moisturizer. Then I top off my look with a little bit of mascara, but I don’t put it where you’d imagine I would put mascara. Nope! I put it somewhere much different from my eyes. You’ll know when you see it.


When I went to my sister’s wedding a few months ago, I opted out of the whole “getting ready” makeup routine. I walked down the aisle bare-faced and everyone said I looked like I was glowing! I did have the makeup artist put a little mascara on me – but not on my eyes and not anywhere else on my body that you’d ever expect. People kept asking, “What’s your secret?” And I kept being like, “Mascara but in a secret place.” And then people were like, “What does that mean” and I was like “I’ll never tell” and they were like “OK well you look amazing” and I was like “I know right? It’s the mascara. It’s hidden in a place where you’ll never find it,” and they were like, “I really can’t talk about this anymore.” Then they’d walk away.


Like, think for a second about where I might have put the mascara? Nope, not there. Not there, either.



It’s so freeing to not have to prescribe to some totally outdated notion of beauty. It’s also downright fun to put mascara in a place that is only known to me and me alone. AND DO NOT ask me because I WON’T tell you.


For all you ladies out there considering going makeup-free with the exception of a few items, I strongly encourage it! For example, I have a whole tube of mascara in my butt.


No, not that butt.