BREAKING: Going Through Car Wash Still Fun as Fuck

 Sources are reporting out of Sacramento, CA that going through a drive-through car wash is still fun as fuck.


“I just went through a car wash for the first time in many years,” says Matilde Naranjo. “I thought that maybe I had remembered it as more fun than it actually is because it was sort of a beloved childhood experience. But no. It’s actually just a genuine thrill every single one of the seven times we went through it.”


Myriad sources corroborate the claim that going through the car wash is a goddamn blast.


“Basically everything about it is cool,” says Dani Rogers. “There’s the foam, those spinny thingies, the long sort of tendrils. It’s like entering a whole other world.”



“Honestly, it’s a top tier form of entertainment,” Rogers adds. “And then also it cleans your car.”


Drive-through car washes are also reported to be “sick,” “kind of trippy,” and “a cool setting for a scene in a movie.”


“I only wish they could be longer,” says Naranjo. “Because if we’re being real, going through a drive-through car wash is probably one of the top three or four things you can do as a human with a car.”


“The sounds, the visuals, the joy of going through it with someone else in the car with you and pretending you’re going to open the windows,” she adds. “It’s a feast for the senses and the mind.”


At press time, we decided we want to go through a car wash right freaking now.