Aww! Despite what you might be thinking, this silly doggo on this 6 train thinks he’s in literal hell!
“Since this dog lacks the ability to conceptualize the subway or why he is otherwise in a rattling metal box speeding through a dark underworld,” says animal behavioral expert Dr. Penny Hayes. “Max believes himself to have died and been sentenced to eternity in a punitive and merciless doggy Hell.”
Doggy hell?! Sounds to us a bit like human Heaven!
“It isn’t a cute thing,” says Dr. Hayes. “Based on his ear positioning, he’s probably having an anxiety attack or an existential crisis right now.”
Aww! Doggy existential crisis!
“While it’s somewhat out of the scope of what I can claim definitively,” says Dr. Hayes, “I would assume that Max is currently poring over the events of his life to try and determine at what point the scale tipped toward damnation.”
Witnesses on the scene corroborate Dr. Hayes’ account.
“Aw, man!” says Sam Ocampo. “That dog thinks he’s in hell! He’s pretty cute though.”
Sources close to the story report Max just tucked his nose under his paws and is looking around nervously.
Woof! No matter how you slice it, it’s a bad day for Max the dog who thinks he’s in l’inferno!