5 Tricks to Keep Your Bangs Looking Cute But Realistically Still a Little Fucked Up

So you took the plunge shortly after your relationship fell apart and got bangs. If you’ve had bangs before, you’ll know they are not easy to maintain, so it’s good to manage your expectations. Here are a few tricks to make your bangs as cute as possible, but probably still a little bit fucked up.


Try not to use heat tools, but definitely don’t throw them away.

Some strands of your bangs will need to be straightened at a 43-degree angle with a curve at the top to ensure they don’t lay flat across your forehead like some kind of scene kid. Other strands will naturally look perfect and you’ll have to do absolutely nothing to them. Just don’t throw out your iron, you might need it to fix that one fucked up part.


For natural wave and volume, try using a light-hold mousse.

You will want to use the good mousse that is $300 and inevitably squeeze out too much in your hand every time you attempt to use it. This will help give your bangs some bounce and control, but probably also make them look just a little bit wet.


On hot days, try pinning your bangs away from your face.

This way, everyone will have a much clearer view of the forehead acne you were originally trying to hide, which has now bloomed out of control due to oil from your bangs.


Try hairspray to get your bangs to stay in place.

This will ensure they look good for about 30 minutes before they get clumpy and crunchy and smell a bit off for the rest of the day. But hey, you had that 30 minutes!



When you’re on the go, sneak in a bang check every now and then.

The wind or really any environment at all will mess up your delicate craftsmanship, but you can just sneak in another bang check anytime you walk more than five feet. It helps to have a mirror handy at all times to know exactly how fucked up your bangs are at any given moment.


If all else fails, let your bangs run wild. Say goodbye to your mother. Convert a van into a tiny home, throw your phone in a lake, and live in the desert. But don’t despair – your ugly bangs will grow out and you can return to society in roughly five years!