Wealthy Bitch Bragging About Going to the Dentist Again

In recent news, 29-year-old Shawna Denner, the wealthiest in her friend group, won’t shut up about how she’s headed to the dentist again – the third time she’s been there this month.


After a complex root canal procedure and the re-cementing of two caps, Shawna’s friends have definitely noticed she’s really been treating herself to these brutal and necessary dental procedures.


“We get it, your dad is a venture capitalist and you only have a full-time job to earn extra spending money,” says Andrea Barnes. “But do you really have to show off by texting us a picture of your mouth full of expensive dentistry tools? I’m glad you can afford dental care, but stop bragging!”


“I wish I could be late to work because I of an emergency root canal,” says Tilly Luce. “Sorry, Shawna, but that lifestyle is unrealistic for some people.”


Despite her friends’ unsupportive attitude, Shawna insists that most of her procedures are covered by dental insurance.


“That bitch has dental insurance? Must be nice,” added Tilly.



“I am in so much pain,” says Shawna, through bloody gauze.


Sources confirm those close to Shawna have stopped returning her calls asking for rides to and from the dentist.


“Manicures, we get. We budget in weekly manicures too obviously,” says Barnes. “But going to the dentist that much? Who does that bitch think she is?”