Say What?!?! New Slang for Winter

Reductress - Say What, Carly Monardo

As you slippery slide into winter, try out our new winter-centric ice cold slang!

 

Boxing Day
n. The one day a year where you experiment with a woman.

 

Christmas Carol
n. The middle-aged woman in your office who wears holiday vests.

 

Christmas Spirit
n. Any alcoholic beverage that gets you through this month.

 

Cold Snap
n. The bitchy attitude brought on drinking all night, just because it’s too cold to leave the bar.

 

Dancer & Prancer
n. The gay besties you need to drag you out into this weather in order to have a good time.

 

ELF
n. Exasperating Little Fuck.
Ex: “Sarah’s son better not be at brunch. He’s such an ELF.”

 

Grinch
n. An aggressive and unhappy camel toe.

 

Hannukah Bush
n. The pubic hair you let grow out, knowing there’s no chance of getting laid while at home with family this week.

 

Hot Toddy
n. An enthusiastic bartender who you can’t tell if he’s gay or straight.

 

Leg-nog
n. The pasty, yellow tone of your skin.
Ex: “I’m wearing pants, ‘cause I need to cover up this Leg-Nog.”

 

Letter to Santa
n. A fun and festive way to leave a passive-aggressive note for your roommate.
Ex: “Dear Santa: I don’t want anything this Xmas, just maybe you could buy some coconut water for Sloane since she keeps drinking mine.”

 

Little Drummer Boy
n. A skinny hipster percussionist in a band.

 

Lump of Coal
n. A fugly-ass diamond ring.
Ex: “I’m happy Liza finally got engaged this year, but what’s with the Lump of Coal?”

 

Santa’s Little Helper
n. A cute name for your credit card.

 

Screw Year’s
v. The attitude you have towards making any meaningful change in your life in this dismal time of year.
Synonyms: “Fuck it!”
Ex: “Do you want to join David Barton with me this year?” “No. Screw Year’s!”

 

Stocking Stuffers
n. Holiday-sized legs shoved in a pair of too-small panty hose.

 

Ugly Sweater Party
n. A party full of ugly, sweaty people.

 

Winter One-derland
n. A whimsical way to describe the isolation brought on by your seasonal depression.