Everyone wants to be happy, but science shows that it might not be worth it. Smiling creates lines and wrinkles that grow deeper as you age, much like the cuts your razor will make as your shaky old-woman hands try to maintain some semblance of a youthful appearance.
When you smile, the wrinkly cracks in your leathery face are accentuated; everyone notices that you’ve grown old, until they finally stop noticing you altogether. That’s what smiling does to otherwise normal, young-looking people.
You may also have dimples, which look great on a child, but are cavernous wounds on your liver-spotted adult visage.
“I used to be proud of my dimples,” said Nora Schultz, 48, who was once attractive. “Men used shout at me, ‘Why don’t you smile, baby? You’re so pretty when you smile.’ But now they know there’s no potential there.”
Doctors advise women to stop smiling at age 30 or at the sign of their first gray hair. Enjoyable activities such as live entertainment, home entertainment, and funny friends should be strictly avoided from that point on.
Remember: like sex, smiling is a very dangerous activity that should be practiced only in youth.