Sexual Appetite: Tips for Hiding How Hungry You are During Sex

hunger sex

Congrats! You are 30 days into your liquid-only diet, and men are finally ready to see you naked. Before you and your dude do the deed, here are some tips to keep your man from hearing that tummy growl:

 

Cover Stomach Rumbling With Sexual Moans.

Seems like you just can’t win with this stomach! First it was too big from eating solid food meals and now it’s repulsively grumbling. Mask those ugly body noises with some sexy primal growls, grunts and moans. Your man will return the favor by being a total animal between the sheets.

 

Don’t Be the First to Bring Up Food Play.

Using whipped cream and edible panties can be fun, but don’t reveal how shamefully famished you are by bringing it up first. If he suggests it, play it cool with a sly line like: “Oh wow I never thought about that. Yeah, sure, I guess? Only if you want.” Voila! You’re sounding thin, and your secret is safe.

 

Avoid the Kitchen at all costs.

Don’t Let Your Survival Instincts Sell You Out. Sexing in places other than the bedroom can be fun, but try not to be too persistent when suggesting moving the hanky-panky to the pantry. That’s your subconscious acting fat. Think like a thin person and suggest fooling around on a treadmill.

 

 

Double Your Pleasure!

If possible, chew some sugar-free gum during sex. It’s a low calorie way to stave off hunger pangs. Take your thoughts away form the catabolysis eating your muscles and organs to keep your nervous system functional and focus it back to the task at hand: getting bizzay!

 

Worst-Case Scenario.

Ok, so you let it slip and actually said “I’m Hungry”. These words by themselves can be a major turn off to the opposite sex. Don’t Panic! Try these flirty modifications:

· “I’m hungry - For YOU cutie!
· “I’m starving - For some sexy time.
· “I feel so weak - In the knees for you!
· “Is that a banana in your pocket can I have it are you gonna eat it I don’t care how old it is - Or are you happy to see me?
· “You smell like food.” (but then wink)


 

Happy (ending) Meal.

He’ll be stunned and perhaps question how fast and efficient your hand job is. Assure him you are just eager to blow his mind rather than ravenously hungry for a taste of his protein-rich ejaculate. Treat yourself by swallowing his low-calorie reward!

 

Now you’ve avoided embarrassment and are on your way to keeping your summer romance steamy. Once he is satisfied and sleeping, sneak into his bathroom and feast on all his delicious chewable vitamins and toothpaste. BONE-apétit!

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