What to Do When Your First Pegging Opens Up A Mandela Effect Portal Where Sinbad’s Shazaam Exists

For most straight cis women out there, banging your partner like you’re the one with the dick can feel like you’re living in an alternate reality. But what if your kinky sexcapade actually does open up an entire world of misremembered events in your brain that indicate the actual existence of parallel universes including one where Shazaam was a real movie starring the famed comedian Sinbad? Here are some tips on how to undo a pegging so good it made you both remember a very specific historical event that didn’t actually happen.

 

Have him give you anal while shouting all the Looney tunes characters.

So you pegged your man so good you’re now both remembering that the Looney Tunes cartoon was spelled as Looney Toons.. This is wrong. Of course, the easiest undo for a pegging-induced Mandela Effect alternate reality is to have him “peg you back.” Maybe you’re not into anal, but sorry, this is the only way.

 

Read the Berenstain Bears three times out loud while in a standing 69.

Amongst many false memories of the Mandela Effect are people claiming the Berenstain Bears was actually spelled BerenSTEIN Bears. If you’re feeling this memory, undo your brain-altering peg sash with a little standing 69 while chanting the text from your favorite Berenstain Bear book aloud three times to please the pegging gods. “‘Nobody goes to bed at eight o’clock anymore,’ protested brother!”

 

 

Maybe just stay in this world, it’s better.

Honestly, why didn’t Sinbad portray a genie named Shazaam? In the Mandela Effect alternate reality world, you can rent the VHS at a Blockbuster that never closed, settle in with your man, and watch a film that sounds honestly amazing. Why should we try to deny that reality exists?! If you peg so good it fucks with your recollection of world events and pop culture, maybe you’re just revealing everything as it should be.

 

Trying new things in bed can bring you to a new state of mind-altering climax, but that doesn’t mean it should tear into an alternate dimension and change the course of 90’s kid flicks. False memories are best meant for lighter things, like your suppressed memory of vomiting in front of your entire second grade class. Not Sinbad’s film career!

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