I’ve never been into personality tests, but all my friends are obsessed with them. But when they finally convinced me to take the Myers-Briggs test, which is supposed to tell you about your psychological make-up and how you make decisions, it told me I have HPV. Needless to say, I did not know this was an option.
My friend Tessa is an ESTJ, which means she thrives on order and organization. My sister Meghan is an ISFJ, which means she’s a natural caretaker who loves to help others. I’m an HPV, which isn’t on the chart, and I guess means I have to see a doctor.
Has anyone else gotten that result?
When I was taking the test, I answered over 80 questions about how I like to interact with people, what makes me feel most comfortable, and how I think of myself. I didn’t answer any questions about my body or sexual partners. So how is it that they know? And does anyone have a good gynecologist that takes my insurance?
I thought that maybe my results were a fluke, so I took the test again, but I got the same result! No matter how I answer the test, I’m an HPV. Tessa got pretty pissed at me that I would take the test again, because you’re just supposed to answer it honestly the first time around. I wanted to be mad at her, but that was so like an ESTJ that I couldn’t blame her.
This is weird though, right?
My friends love that the Myers-Briggs test reveals patterns of thought and can help guide healthy interactions. I personally feel like I don’t stick up for myself very much, and was hoping that my Myers-Briggs result would shine some light on why that happens. Instead, the only light being shone will be one up my vagina by a trained professional because I am now at risk for illnesses such as cervical cancer. This is not the kind of result I was looking for.
Ultimately, I’m glad I took the test. HPV has no symptoms and I’m not sure I would have been diagnosed if I hadn’t tried to figure out what my negotiating and partnership style based on Jungian psychology. Weird, huh?