“Salad” is an abstract concept, so the only thing we know for sure is that it means “a mix of stuff that’s kind of healthy.” You can take advantage of this vague definition by calling most everything a salad, because technically, it is! Here are all the yummiest foods you can technically call a salad when someone questions your food choice.
Popcorn
Small pieces of food? Check. Made from a plant? Check. When your nosey co-worker asks what you’re having for lunch today, you can look her straight in the eyes and say, “I’m having a warm corn and sea salt salad, Megan,” as you gingerly dress it in liquid butter.
A Bowl of M&Ms Someone Left Out
Nutritionists say that the best salads are full of color, and what has more colors than an entire bowl of M&M candies? People will say that’s not what they meant by “rainbow salad,” but they also can’t tell you you’re wrong to call it that.
Mixed Drinks with Food in The Glass
A standard mixed drink is obviously not a salad because it’s alcohol. But throw in a mint leaf or chunk of fruit and suddenly you’re sipping on a “fresh medley.” Bonus points if you drink it from a huge margarita glass which, let’s be honest, is a bowl.
Bowl of Ranch Dressing with a Leaf on Top
It’s called “salad” dressing. This means that anything you want to put Ranch on is a salad because it is being dressed by the salad dressing. You are just one bowl of ranch from being a healthier person.
A Stack of Personal Pan Pizzas
Pizza is not a salad because you use your hands to eat it. Pizza is a salad when you stack it so high that you have to cut it up into smaller pieces and use a fork. Now all that’s left to do it close your eyes and believe it!
Remember: the only good thing about salad is that it’s whatever you want it to be. Next time you tell yourself, “I really should eat a salad for lunch today,” you can eat whatever you want and still feel good about your choices. Now everyone can be a salad eater!
