Recent data compiled from online quiz results startled researchers this week: according to Dr. Anne Dunn of Northwestern University, both introverts and extroverts are equally and unfailingly self-obsessed.
According to the study, both extroverts and introverts suffer an enormous amount of imagined social judgment due to their respective personality afflictions, which leads them to feel the need to flaunt their quiz results publicly.
“It’s very shocking to think that introverts are just as egotistical and narcissistic as extroverts,” says Dr. Dunn. “But the numbers don’t lie.”
One online quiz titled, “Are You An Introvert or An Extrovert?” helped researchers determine the extent to which everyone is an egomaniac, as 40 million introverts and extroverts took the quiz, instead of focusing on anything other than themselves.
“I’m sick of pandering to all my introverted friends’ needs,” local extrovert Karin Michaels exclaimed loudly. “It’s time that they open up and accept me for the proud, outspoken person I am!”
“I need people to know that quiet time is essential for me,” introverted banker Calvin Stewart said. “If I don’t put that on my Facebook and Twitter feeds, how will people know why I’m so awkward in public? There’s more to me than meets the eye.”
What may seem like a stark divide between very defined personality types, extroverts and introverts will always be able to agree on one thing: uncompromising, narcissistic vanity.
When asked if she found any of the data alarming, Dr. Dunn could not be reached for comment. She was in the middle of taking the quiz, “How Introverted Are You for an Extrovert?”