Nothing says elegance like a classic updo. Unfortunately, you can’t style your hair in one because you chopped your locks into a chic bob when you felt you “just needed a change”. That was super shortsighted of you! Why not try (and fail) one of these hairstyles that can never be done on hair that falls just below the ears?
Fishtail Braided Chignon
To create this style, you will need hairspray, bobby pins, and at least three more inches of hair—oh well! This look is achieved by creating a braid from hair so long Rapunzel would be jealous, then wrapping it around the crown of the head. Since you struggle to put your hair in even a ponytail, a fishtail braid is completely out of the question. You might have better luck just wearing it down?
Messy Ballerina Bun
The point of this updo is to look elegant-sloppy, but if you try to sweep your hair into a bun on the top of your head you’ll just look sloppy-sloppy. To attempt this look, pull your hair away from the nape of your neck, realize that there’s not nearly enough length to do anything with it, then wistfully look at old photos from college before you chopped off all your hair. You looked so cute!!!
The Gibson Tuck
This vintage look is a fun throwback to the days when only men had short hair. The great thing about this updated take on an old classic is that it can be done on shorter hair lengths, but none as short as yours. Simply take an elastic headband and try to twist your hair around it. After getting frustrated because it’s impossible, try to wear the headband normally, then remove it once you realize even that makes your hair stick out weird. Good Christ, what were you thinking?
This trick updo has been popular on the red carpet with celebrities such as Eva Mendez. By creating the illusion of shorter hair, this look rubs it in that long locks are able to rock any look, but there’s basically zero available options for short hair. If you didn’t already have a real bob, you’d be able to sport a faux bob just like the mother to Ryan Gosling’s child! Start to do this look, then give up and cry because you could have faked it instead of donating to Locks of Love like an idiot.
After trying and failing, complete your elegant look by wondering if you should grow your hair out again!