Sad! The Leaky Cauldron Is A Starbucks Now

In recent wizarding world news, The Leaky Cauldron, a popular pub for wizards and witches alike located on Diagon Alley, has closed its doors and has been replaced by the American coffeehouse chain Starbucks.

 

This is so sad for our favorite little magic spot!

 

This news is devastating to many Leaky Cauldron patrons, considering the pub has been around since the 1500s and there is another Starbucks just two blocks away.

 

“This is such a tragedy for the wizarding community,” says Blofus Garbhook, a regular at the pub. “That place was a huge part of wizard culture. Where are we going to convene? If you think we left without a fight and tons of spells, you’re out of your mind.”

 

Many wizards have since come forward to express outrage over the Leaky Cauldron’s shutdown.

 

“Me mum’s mum sat in that there chair and they had ta pry this brandy from me hand before they close them doors,” says Daphna Cooblebrank, another regular.

 

Still, some feel like the street could benefit from some change.

 

“I like caramel macchiatos,” says Quelina Horseblam Prick, a newly graduated witch who is one of the few looking forward to Starbucks’ arrival. “Also the free wifi. Sorry, but I need internet. Also, all the Leaky Cauldron served was soup. Sue me for wanting a cake pop once in a while!”

 

 

Despite the outrage, landlady of the pub and upstairs inn Hannah Abbott says that not could have been done to save the pub.

 

“They raised our rent so we were forced out,” says Hannah. “We tried to make The Leaky Cauldron a historical landmark because we were ultimately the portal from muggle life to the most famous street in London for wizards. But the clock ran out on that plan.”

 

How tragic! So long, dirty dungeon bar and hello to get another dumb ‘bucks!

 

In other news, sources confirm that Amazon is also slated to move into the Forbidden Forest sometime next year.

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