As 2016 comes to a close, it’s important to ask yourself the big questions. What were you most proud of this year? What are you planning to learn from? And, of course, which of Trump’s conflict of interests are you most like? As we approach Trump’s inauguration, it’s best to answer this question so you know what you relate to. Take the quiz and find out!
- What’s your favorite holiday tradition?
A: I don’t care what I do, as long as I’m with my family! I’m actually always with my family.
B: Calling all of my exes in a furious succession.
C: Staying in my pajamas for five days straight—that’s what the holidays are for!
- What do you like most about your job?
A: The way we always know exactly what everyone else is doing at all times.
B: I love hanging out in the company Slack. I’ll answer pretty much anything, even if it’s inappropriate!
C: I get to work from home—there’s nothing like doing conference calls from your couch!
- What are you most likely to get fired for?
A: Bringing my daughter to an important company meeting. I know it’s not appropriate, but I can’t stand being apart from her all day!
B: Posting pics of confidential documents. What can I say? I love Instagram!
C: Not showing up. Sorry, but I love to play hooky!
- Where are you planning to invest money, no matter what?
B: Businesses abroad.
C: My own business.
Mostly A’s: You’re Trump’s Blind Trust! You’re a family gal, aren’t you? In order to prevent conflicts of interest, Trump has been asked to sell off his business holdings or put them in a blind trust to be managed by someone with whom he’ll have no contact. Instead he has decided to give his business to his children—people with whom he certainly has contact, and who are also a part of his political transition team! Your commitment to family and your dangerous confidence means you’re a good girl who makes bad choices—out of love, or something like it. Now go call a lawyer and have him sort your life out properly, okay?
Mostly B’s: You’re Trump’s Phone Call With Taiwan! You digital bitch! You’re just like Trump, who called Taiwanese President Tsai Ing-wen despite decades of international protocol that would have cautioned against it. Why is this a conflict of interest? The Trump Organization is reportedly planning to expand into Taiwan! Yikes! Just like Trump, you need to stay away from your phone. It gets you into trouble, which you should try to avoid—even if you do love being a bad girl.
Mostly C’s: You’re Trump’s Secret Service Detail! You simply love comfort. Melania and Barron Trump have announced that they plan to remain in New York, despite a legacy of first families occupying the White House. This means they will require a secret service detail in New York. The problem? That means they’ll need to rent out an entire floor of the Trump Tower—and that money goes straight to the Trump organization. Melania and Barron also plan to fly in their private jets, and when the secret service accompany them, that’s even more money going into their pockets. Sorry, taxpayers! You’re just like this conflict of interest because you love comfort. You don’t like to change up the routine, and want to stay at home where you feel like yourself. What a massive problem for the rest of us!