We’re a women’s mag, so we promise you that we can guess your bra size. Not immediately, of course. You have to give us a second. Just be patient, okay? Take this quiz and we can totally guess it.
1. How would you describe your own breasts?
b) My boys
d) Shuttlecock and Battledore
2. What about the nipples?
a) They are cute, small, and pink
c) This feels invasive
3. Is it a B cup?
c) I don’t have time for this
d) One is
4. Wait, just wait, okay?
c) You said you would guess and this is taking way too long. I’m wearing a blazer and I have a meeting to get to.
d) I’ve been waiting…
5. Lift your shirt. Let’s have a look at those bad boys.
b) Are you serious? That’s super perverted
c) Not a quiz.
d) I haven’t been wearing a shirt this entire time.
6. Hold on. We’ve almost got it. Seriously…F?
a) Aw, that’s sweet
b) Do I look like I have a fucking F cup?
d) One is
7. Just tell us what your size is.
a) Sure, if that releases me from the existential hell that is this quiz
b) YOU PROMISED ME YOU WOULD GUESS! I REQUIRE A GUESS!
c) Truly I do not care
d) I love this quiz!
If you answered…
Mostly A’s: 40D
Mostly B’s: 32B
Mostly C’s: Give us a second…36C?
Mostly D’s: Your boobs are two different sizes, what’s up with that?