Yesterday was the second day of my period. Needless to say, I was experiencing a very heavy flow. So heavy, that my period became a blood ocean with waves and everything! So my friends, coworkers and people who were just walking by grabbed surfboards from the nearby surf shop and had so much fun riding my menstrual waves!
I bet you’re thinking, ‘Wow, that must be a lot of period blood!’ And it was. It was a lot of period blood. But it’s nothing you haven’t seen before in a scary movie. Except it was way more. This time it wasn’t scary blood, it was good blood, because as soon as the blood started drenching everyone, the sun came out and the drinks and the tunes were also flowing. All my friends had fun.
Some women tell me they hate their periods, but I’m just happy I got to facilitate an activity where all the people I love could come together, put on wetsuits and surf without worrying about sharks! I did experience intense cramps throughout the day, but a bunch of my desk buddies gave me high fives, which cheered me up! We all had a really good time together.
Logistically, it wasn’t even that hard to make an ocean out of my uterine blood. I just found some flat land, and stood there for about two hours with my legs spread. The dry land filled up, the current was strong, and the sun was shining, so my friends were able to have tons of fun. My best friend Pauline came by, and even though she doesn’t like to surf (because she had a bad experience one time in Maui), she was able to float in period and tan her body on the shore of my period, having tons and tons of fun.
As I lay there, dehydrated and dangerously low on iron, I smiled. Then I blacked out, because I was drained of so much blood. But when I blacked in, a snack shack had appeared on my period beach and my boss brought me a strawberry popsicle. I already felt incredibly emotional, and burst into tears of gratitude while the burst of sugar made me feel better physically which was pretty nice.
As I watched my friends, some old and some new, surfing on my period, I finally felt like I understood why we get our periods in the first place. My period doesn’t happen to shed uterine lining. It happens to flow so hard that people can surf and have a carefree day of fun. I know in my heart that’s the purpose of my period.
I am truly exhausted from creating an ocean of period blood, and as I type this I’m hooked up to an IV because I almost died. But, the whole gang is hoping we can get together for another activity that includes my period next month. I told them, ‘Hey, I’ll do my best!’ I was having some cramps but we all just laughed because we were having so much fun.