Man At Pool Acting Like He’s Not Jacked

Multiple sources are reporting that a man at a local pool is walking around, pretending not to be absolutely ripped this afternoon.

 

The scene began developing earlier today when 29-year-old A.J. Tanner appeared at a public pool in North Hollywood, California. Poolgoers immediately took notice of the fact that he was incredibly muscular. What patrons found more surprising, however, was the fact that Tanner did not appear aware that he was incredibly muscular.

 

“He was walking around like a normal guy,” says Heather Alpers, a lifeguard on duty that day. “When in fact, he was not a normal guy. He was a very strong, very ripped guy.”

 

At various points in the day, Tanner was seen leaving the showers, practicing his dives, and taking in sun in a beach chair. Not once was he spotted flexing, talking about his muscles, or indicating in any way that he had a god-like body, which he objectively did.

 

“It was wild,” says Tiffany Calvin, a patron of the pool. “He was just doing normal person things. I never once saw him doing strong guy things. What game is he playing at?”

 

Tanner’s demeanor, which could be categorized as humble by some, was off putting to others.

 

“I was like, yeah right,” says Paul Fender, a father visiting the pool with his two children on the day of the incident. “Like you don’t know you’re jacked. It takes a lot of work to be that jacked.”

 

Multiple attendees reportedly tried to goad Tanner into talking about his hot body, by asking things like “Do you work out?” and “How big are your arms?”

 

 

Tanner, seemingly determined to pretend to not be ripped, demurred on all questions.

 

Sources reported that around 5pm, he put on a shirt in a way that didn’t emphasize how rock-hard his abs were, and then walked to his car with a gait that could not be categorized as either “strutting” or “sauntering”. He merely walked, no different than any other poolgoer.

 

But to the attendees of NoHo Public Pool, he will always be remembered as anything but a normal pool goer.

 

“He was jacked,” Tiffany says. “And deep down, he knows it. He fucking knows it.”