‘It’d Just Be So Much Easier To Date Women,’ Says Tired and Correct Straight Woman

Exhausted by her most recent interactions with the white cisgender men in her life, 28-year-old Rachel Tambor, a straight woman, made the absolutely correct realization on Tuesday that, “It’d just be so much easier to be a lesbian.”

 

Tambor, whose two-year heterosexual relationship with a man ended abruptly the day before her birthday, has been weighing her seemingly dwindling options in the dating pool and is now utterly exhausted. Now, she has accurately stated that dating a woman would be objectively better overall.

 

“I mean, when you think about it, women really do understand women better,” correctly observed Tambor. “And they generally know what words like ‘consent’ and ‘feelings’ mean and are probably easier to build a lasting relationship with.”

 

Despite sexual orientation not being a choice, Tambor is certain that dating a woman is the solution to her relationship woes. And she is right.

 

“It really seems like there’s a better, simpler way—and that’s being a lesbian,” said Tambor, who is making some really good points. “Because the men I’ve dated in the past have all either played games or ghosted me in the middle of a weekend trip or dumped me because I wanted to go to my mother’s birthday dinner instead of seeing his band play at a college party.”

 

When asked to comment on Tambor’s experience, her closest lesbian friend confirmed her theory.

 

 

“Every relationship requires work and it’s hard to make generalizations about a whole group of people,” said Sammy Giordano. “But when I hear my straight friends talk about their relationships I’m like wow yep women are SO much better than cis men.”

 

Tambor has flirted with the idea of toggling on the “Women” settings on all her dating apps.

 

“At the very least, I just need a break from men right now,” she said.

 

Tambor’s ex-boyfriend commented without being asked to:

 

“Oh, she’s into girls now? That’s pretty hot.”

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