How to Win an Argument by Yelling, ‘We’re Saying the Same Thing!’

It’s important to feel free to express yourself and to stand strong in your beliefs, but sometimes we all get stuck in arguments that feel like they just won’t end. Maybe you both believe the same thing, but slightly differently, or maybe you don’t agree on anything at all but you don’t want to admit it. So here’s how to politely wrap things up while also winning the argument by yelling, “We’re saying the same thing!”

 

Lead up to it with a “right, but…”

When you’re violently disagreeing with someone, it’s important to find common ground and let you know that you’re hearing them, even if they’re wrong. So tell them they’re right before correcting them for being wrong. You two are basically saying the same thing except they are saying it more wrongly!

 

Assure them that in the end, you both have the same common goal.

Even though you both have two totally opposite ideas for how to fix our schools or the way the media handles gun control, it’s important to reaffirm that “we both love kids! This is about the kids!” Shouting the commonalities at someone let’s them know that no, stop it, you’re actually on the same side of things!

 

 

Finally, scream, “We’re saying the same fucking thing!!!”

You’re saying different things, which is why this is an argument, but a great way to simplify it all and just swiftly put an end to it all is to tell the other person that you’re actually saying the same thing. This will be confusing enough for them that they won’t know how to react. Are you saying what they’ve been saying all along or are you misinterpreting what they’re saying to mean what you’re saying? They’ll never know, but they will know that this conversation has abruptly ended via your declarative shouts and you seem to have won via having the last word. Congrats!

 

Sometimes winning an argument is as simple as giving up and yelling, “We’re saying the same thing!” at someone. So once you’re done trying to articulate your specific argument, just confusingly take the side of the person you’re talking to with no explanation, and declare it all to be the same. You did it! You won!

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