You’re far too self-aware to post the vain, smoldering, come-hither selfies of your peers, but that doesn’t mean you’re not hot as fuck! Finally, there’s an ironic way for you can plaster your perfect face everywhere. Consider the “Oh Brother!” selfie. It says, “My life is so crazy, I don’t even have time for even a relaxed self-portrait!” Here are some tips on how to take the “Can’t even find time to smile!” selfie you’ve always wanted:
Roll those eyes, girl! Bigger. BIGGER! YOUR LIFE IS SO INSANE RIGHT NOW!
Backcomb your hair for a carefree, tousled look that falls between “nookie with the football team” and “explosion at the chemistry lab.”
Make pretend paperwork stacks (from real paper!). No matter what your profession, you’re a busy businesslady, you don’t have time for this!
Starve yourself for some wiry, panicked, “Don’t have a moment to eat” realness.
Puff out your cheek, as if caught mid-exasperated sigh, but only if you’ve got the face for it.
Above all, have fun!
If there’s anything to be learned from duck face photos, it’s that obvious vanity is off-putting, so take the “self” out of your selfie and be the empty husk that’s sexily overwhelmed by the crushing realities of life. Try it today!