How to Casually Date the Man You’re Already Married to in Your Mind

So you’ve met your future husband, but he says he wants to “keep it casual” for now. That’s totally doable! Here’s how to keep him thinking you’re totally casual too even though you’ve already named all of the babies you’re going to have with him:


Plan Your Spontaneity

He’s not into making concrete plans to go on dates, since that’s like, kind of relationshippy to him. It’s okay—you can show him you’re down with meeting up whenever. Just make sure to always be within ten minutes of his home/work/favorite bar so that when he’s in the mood to see you, you’ll always happen to be available to casually get together. This way, you’ll speed up the path to forever—without seeming needy!


Hide Your Knowledge

Sure, you’ve already memorized the dialogue to his favorite obscure horror movie that he mentioned once, are well-acquainted with the details of his dating history via old Facebook posts and photos, and even know where all of his cousins work thanks to LinkedIn. But he might find your extensive research to be a bit overwhelming while he still thinks you’re “just hanging out.” So when he tells you things you already know, just lean in seductively and say, “Wow, I had no idea you went to Spain when you were 12!”


Disguise Your Flaws

You’ve already come to accept and even love him for his imperfections, from his crooked nose to his DUI record, but there are some things about you that he may not be ready to handle yet, while he thinks you’re “just having a good time.” These include the ounce of cellulite on your left thigh (lights off, baby!) and your massive Cabbage Patch doll collection that will need its own room in the house you’ll eventually buy together (get a storage unit!!). None of it will matter once he realizes you’re The One, but for now, it’s best to just, you know, be casual about it.



Don’t Expect Exclusivity

For now, you need to show him you’re really on board with being “totally not exclusive or anything” so you don’t scare him off. Play it cool when he mentions Christi from the office who you’re almost positive he’s sleeping with. Why would he even think about touching her?? She has an asymmetrical face. You are his wife. Why can’t he realize you are his wife???


Be patient while he takes the time to realize that he wants something way more than casual, too. When he does, all you’ll need to do is finalize the date on the wedding plans you’ve already made, and you’ll live happily ever after!


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