Handwoven Shawls for When You Want to Look Feeble

It’s almost fall—our favorite season for lightweight outerwear. You might be reaching for your chunky sweater, but do you really want to look like you can hold up all that fabric? Like you can do things for yourself? No. What you need is a fall staple that says, “My skeleton can’t be trusted.” Check out these beautiful hand-woven shawls that’ll make you look feeble AF.

 

Aeolian Shawl

Heading to the pumpkin patch? This Aeolian shawl is witchy yet powerless! Drape this delicate knit piece over your shoulders and people will assume you can barely carry your own body weight, let alone a seasonal gourd. Plus, they’ll probably give you a guide for the corn maze since you look like you could collapse at any moment!

 

 

Happsalu Shawl

It’s hard to look sexy in a fall sweater, but not in a Haapsalu shawl! This lace shawl is perfect for nights you want to be especially frail. This Estonian style will make you look like you have consumption, plus you’ll have the erotic appeal of a dying-yet-fuckable maiden. Oh, and your date will be forced to pick up the check since you are too fragile to reach for it. It’s all so far away!

 

Poncho Shawl

Toned, swole shoulders are fine for summer, but when it comes to a structured jacket, that bulk won’t work. The poncho shawl is perfect for broad-shouldered women who still want to give off an incapable, fragile essence. Fortunately, the poncho’s tent shape and loose knit makes it seem like the heaviest thing you can carry is tall grass.

 

Arete Shawl

With this beautiful, finely knit shawl, you can look like it’s one of your first days out of the hospital, even if you have a clean bill of health! Inspired by drawings from The Odyssey, this shawl is perfect for your fall excursions. Everyone on that day hike will be constantly stopping to make sure you have enough water or a rock to sit on. Halfway up, the largest guy in the group might even offer to carry you the rest of the way! Thanks, Arete Shawl!

 

Fringe Shawl

Fall is the perfect time to finally get those professional couples pics taken. But remember, finding a field is easy, but achieving a chic-but-needy look is not. Enter the fringe shawl. It’s large enough to swaddle yourself in, but small enough to still be dainty! Just drape the 4-8 inches of fringe on your man’s forearm, and you’ll have the world convinced that you need to be dependent on someone else forever!

 

For a fall look as frail-looking as it is cute, turn to these fantastic shawls. Happy Autumn!