Friends with Benefits should be a simple, convenient arrangement that allows you to hang with your friend while also having sex with them. But sometimes it can be challenging to figure out how that arrangement could possibly go wrong. Since we know you’re going to try it out no matter what, try these fun FWB arrangements to ruin everything you once liked about each other!
Friends with Secrets
Many friends with benefits situations start with sliding into each other’s DMs on the DL. This fun, secret relationship is perfect for when you both need to get out your sexual tension, but definitely don’t want to ruin this good thing you have going as a friendship. So go ahead and keep your sexy secret, since you only have a few more weeks until all the fun is gone and you are no longer having sex or being friends. Though you began this arrangement with both a friend and benefits, you’re going to come out with neither. Aww, love doesn’t win!
Friends with Denial
A fun twist on the traditional Friends with Benefits arrangement, Friends with Denial is for friends who enjoy being in complete denial about what they’re doing. So don’t even bother calling it “Friends with Benefits,” because you guys have not defined the terms of this situation and therefore guaranteed it will end badly no matter what. Maybe try calling it a “We Have No Idea What We’re Doing or Why We’re Doing it, But We Are” situation. Actually, don’t worry about labels—this friendship is about as dead as the benefits are going to be. Wow, your stupid, clueless genitals are very powerful and you will be left with nothing!
Friends who Need Attention
Some Friends with Benefits like to remain discreet, while others really need everyone to know that they have turned this terrible idea into a reality. If you’re one of those attention-seeking pairs that are doing this just to see if your friends freak out, go ahead and let everyone know so that things can be extra ruined when this is all over. Hope those 13 orgasms were worth the 13 months of complicated bullshit you’ll have to endure now!
So next time you want to take a solid relationship in your life and ruin it, try Friends with Benefitting! You will lose a friendship and the sex will become less fun because it will mostly be confusing. You’ll be benefitting no one in no time!