You’re a beautiful woman living in one of the greatest countries on Earth, and you benefit from being a member of several dominant social, cultural, and racial groups. Sometimes, it’s important to step back and acknowledge the privilege that comes with that. But that doesn’t relieve you of your duty to drive him absolutely wild with your sexy ways! Try these five hot privilege-checking techniques that will have him begging for more:
The Cheek Check
Simply by virtue of the color of your skin, you know you live a life free of the kinds of harassment that others in this country face on a regular basis. You can even flaunt your fierce booty without fear of fetishization, because being white means all your choices are reasonable, according to the dominant cultural narrative. Wear an extra-tight skirt and walk a few feet in front of your man to give him a good look at your curves while verbally acknowledging that you are unlikely to be offensively stereotyped or coopted by a teen pop star.
Check Your Balances
You’re an able-bodied woman with all five senses intact who benefits from our culture’s intrinsic (and technically illegal) discrimination against people with disabilities, so why not flaunt it with a little trip to a high ropes course? Think about all the people for whom this kind of seemingly normal activity is potentially alienating and demoralizing while feeling the exhilaration of the wind in your hair as you fly through the sky! The sense of danger will get his blood pumping, and watching you master that zip line will have him begging for you to be the normative Jane to his mainstream Tarzan. It ain’t privilege if you acknowledge it first, right?
Pickin’ Up the Check
You might only make 77 cents for every dollar he does, but according to the U.S. Census Bureau, your black and Latina peers get an average of 14 cents less than that. Show your thoughtful solidarity by spending that cash on date night. Go ahead, take those extra cents and be his sugar momma for the evening. He’ll love how you take charge (as long as you make sure he knows that the patriarchy still values his work…in the sack!!).
The Check Mate
Every man eventually wants to settle down with that special someone, and being an upper-middle-class white woman means you’re statistically four times more likely to be married by the age of 35 than your non-white peers. Acknowledge this disparity, the implications it has for modern-day family structure, and the financial burden it can potentially place on young mothers while subtly flashing that vacant ring finger his way. Your mouth will be saying, “I care about the systemic socioeconomic problems facing this country” but your body will be saying “I do, big boy!”
The “Check Her Out”
As a straight, cis female, you are never asked to define or defend your gender or sexual orientation, which will make it all the more fun for you and him when you point out that hot girl across the bar. Your empathy for your non-mainstream gender and sexual orientation peers is unquestionable, as is your gender and sex, which you rarely have to consciously consider. Did you just suggest that the two of your send a drink her way, despite knowing that you’re totally wasting her time because you don’t eat box and never will?! You naughty, straight female, you!
Acknowledging all your markings of societal oppression is a surefire way to give him the boner of a lifetime. Have fun out there!