Nothing is more heartwarming than a beautiful baby, and nothing is more moving than a well-placed political statement on that baby. Whether you’re taking a stance against global warming or supporting local businesses, your bouncing baby is the cutest courier to get your powerful message into the world. Mix your baby’s cries with these rallying cries, because our children are our future!
“Everyone should have the right to trial by jury.”
This brave assertion of a major tenet of democracy looks adorable written on a blank onesie! Other mommies will be peanut butter and jealous when they see your baby’s populist new look. Nothing says, “I love my mommy” like a baby who cares about habeas corpus. Great for playtime or the protest happening downtown, your tiny baby will be carry a message even weightier than that diaper!
“Crush terrorism.”
Definitely write this across your bb’s sweet cheeks. As you coo your tiny bowling ball into a sweet slumber, the world can see (on her soft face) that the only way to stop serious terrorist organizations is through relentless and strategic planning. Nobody can disagree with a baby!
“No tax dollars for religious organizations.”
It’s pretty obvious that biased religious groups should never receive government funding, and who better to remind the world than your beautiful agnostic baby? Embroider this statement on your little one’s hat or headband. Without a baby in the pic, people might ask you some hard questions about the nuances of tax-exempt organizations, but when strategically placed on your chunky little baby,
“I don’t stand up for the National Anthem.”
Your baby actually cannot stand yet, and why should she? Your super tiny baby’s forehead is the perfect blank canvas for a statement as endearingly anarchist as this one. Attend baseball games, basketball games, the Kentucky Derby, the inauguration, and remain seated with your defiant little rebel. You pledge allegiance to no flag! You also had a baby!
“9/11 was an inside job.”
Your little one may not know how to talk, but she sure knows that jet fuel doesn’t burn hot enough to melt steel.
