DANGEROUS Diets Doctors Don’t Want You To Use!

Taboo Diets

Discover the effective weight-loss methods medical professionals have been hiding from you for years! Everyone will try to talk you out of trying these questionable fat-melting miracles – but haters gonna hate, so live your life! Even if it doesn’t last that long after this:
 

REtox

Everyone knows the wait between detoxes is Hell on earth, but the only way to start the next detox is by re-toxing. To Retox, simply ingest nothing but red meat, illegal drugs and alcohol for seven days straight. Your body will be perfectly primed for even the most avant-garde detoxes. Retoxing will take you to Hell and back so you can finally get that Kate Moss look right.
 

Vegan Raw ABC

Being “raw” doesn’t mean you’re not guilty of overeating. When you feel you’ve eaten anything close to a full meal, take control by chewing your raw vegan food and spitting it into an eco-friendly waterproof bag. Use VRABC until you reach your ideal weight or for life. With VRABC you’ll be glad you didn’t woof down all those acai berries in one sitting, and chances are you’ll be too tired to consider that extra serving of kale.
 

 

Island Water!

Just like a remote island that is rarely seen, your rectum is the VIP lounge for this new exotic laxative: real, un-sanitized Island Water. Deposit it once a day for thirty days while eating nothing but palm oil. Infused with real Barbados waterfalls and the sweat of dance hall regulars, this cleanse will give you that hot sexy island body (and booty!). So “Pour it up, pour it up”!
 

Soylent

If you aren’t familiar with Soylent – it’s what lady astronauts drink in space to induce vomiting when space sickness becomes too much for them. It was synthesized to handle zero gravity environments and allows you to eat whatever you want! Drink Soylent for rest of your life because it never expires, so the only one who gets spoiled is you!