Bridget On Fourth ‘Soulmate’

According to recent Instagram history, Bridget Simmons has just met her fourth soulmate, whom Bridget insists is, “for real this time.”

 

The most recent video clip shows Bridget with an unidentified man unfamiliar to her friends, where she can be heard saying, “This guy is my soulmaaaaaaaaate!”

 

In a press conference earlier today, Bridget was hesitant to answer any questions of merit about her relationship, but eager to announce his official role as current soulmate.

 

“When you know, you know,” Bridget told reporters. “And I know all the time.”

 

Bridget then detailed her love for her new beau in the caption, listing all the great things about him with appropriate emojis, which bears a stark similarity to a post from 2014 about her second soulmate, Bryan.

 

The comments included such questions as “But what is his name?” and “Congratulations??”

 

Friends and family were shocked by this latest revelation, but less shocked than before having been through this process four times now.

 

“I really preferred Soulmate #2 over the rest of them,” says Bridget’s lifelong best friend, Maya. “But they were only soulmates for a couple months.”

 

 

A commenter on Bridget’s photo with #4 captioned, “He’s the one, for real this time, the ONE one,” asked: “Is this a new guy or the same one as before??”

 

Conveniently for Bridget’s friends, Soulmate #4 bears a strong resemblance to #3, so it won’t take much to adjust to the new one, or inevitably to adjust to the next one who will probably look like them, too.

 

When questioned about her growing list of perfect matches, Bridget explained, “Some people just get more soulmates than other people, I guess.”

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