Aww! This Child Has The Uncanny Ability To Make Comments That Exacerbate Your Specific Insecurities

Most kids might say something adorably innocent or outrageously ridiculous. But Ava Dudley isn’t like most kids: She can take it a step further and say something that cuts directly to the core of any specific and deep insecurity you face! Aww, kids say the darndest things!

 

“I’ve been in childcare for 16 years,” says her nanny, Tanya Bard. “But I’ve never come across a kid who is so precise in choosing the exact thing you’re feeling extra insecure about that day and making a targeted comment about it.”

 

“For example, if you forget to shave your legs for a couple days, this kid is on it with a precise and cutting, ‘Why do your legs look like a cactus?’” Bard adds. “She’s also quick to inquire about why you have holes in your face  or if you’ve ever considered straightening your hair.”

 

 

So adorable. We’re speechless!

 

Ava wasn’t simply born with the uncanny ability to reduce an adult woman to tears with one pointed insult. As a preschooler, little Ava used to blindly compliment those in her life.

 

“She’d say things like, ‘You’re so pretty!’ and ‘Your hair is so shiny!’” says Ava’s mother, Claire. “She could make anyone’s day better with one of her sweet observations.”

 

But since graduating to first grade, Ava has become more aware of others’ flaws but not self-aware enough to inhibit herself from making statements that point out and exacerbate those flaws.

 

“Just the other day, I had this giant, inflamed zit right in the middle of my forehead,” her nanny explained, “Anyone with any kind of tact would’ve ignored my blemish. But not Ava – she made a point to immediately remark ‘Woah Tanya, that’s a big pimple!’ upon seeing it. I was so self-conscious about it for the rest of the day. She’s amazing!”

 

Ever the innovator, Ava has expanded her lack of sensitivity from just the people close to her to acquaintances and strangers. Recently, she kindly pointed out a very obvious facial tick to a man with Tourette’s syndrome.

 

“He was doing a weird thing with his eye, and everyone else in the subway car was just pretending like it wasn’t happening,” said Ava.

 

Ava’s mother thinks she has a real future in scathing observations. “I think she’d make a great advertising executive. I mean, she’s clearly very talented when it comes to identifying and pointing out people’s most anxiety-producing shortcomings. All she’d have to do is learn how to do it to manipulate those insecurities for a profit. She’s halfway there!”

 

“Mom, you have spit coming out of your mouth while you’re talking,” Ava responded in affirmation.

COMMENTS

view all comments hide comments

Comments are closed.