Fall is here, and we just can’t get enough pumpkin spice – even in the bedroom! Here are some hot tips to help you incorporate the sexiest autumnal flavor into your sex life. Get ready to keep him going longer than a Yankee candle:
1. The Pie Dive
Take a warm pumpkin pie fresh out of the oven and set it at the foot of your bed. Alternate between having sex and eating the pumpkin pie.
2. Smash That Pumpkin
Find the perfect, fully ripened pumpkin and carve a dick-sized hole in it. Fuck him with the pumpkin. When he asks, “Where’s the spice?” you can tell him, “It’s inside my vagina.” He’ll love it!
3. The Early Snowstorm
Just before you’re about to have sex, blow a line of pumpkin spice off his huge, hard cock. He’ll love the sensation, and you’ll love the pumpkin spice! Just don’t let it linger too long. The pumpkin spice will burn his penis.
4. The PSL Surprise
Tell him you got him a PSL. He’ll think you mean Pumpkin Spiced Latte, but when he gets excited, surprise him by sitting on his face with your Pumpkin-Spiced Labia. Men love being surprised!
5. Deep-Throat a Pumpkin
Tie him to the bed, but instead of doing what he expects, whip out a pumpkin and start deep-throating the stem. He’ll get so hard watching you that you might be able to skip the blowjob altogether! This will leave more room in your mouth for pumpkin spice.
6. Tell Him You’re On the Pumpkin Spice Pill
When he goes to get a condom, tell him you’re on the pill. Then, wink and say “the pumpkin pill.” He won’t know what that means, and neither will you, but it doesn’t matter because you’ll still fuck him without a condom.
Now, get in there and put the “pump” back into “pumpkin spice”!