Fresh veggies are ripe for the picking and a vegan lifestyle is as attainable as ever! Since you’re still a lonely, vacant shell of a person after having exhausted all your other interests this year, you might as well try veganism! What the hell, right? You really don’t have anything at all to lose, do you? Here are four tasty vegan recipes for when you want to feel like you belong to something, anything at all.
Three-Bean Chili With Spring Pesto
This delicious chili is chock full of protein and beans! Spring pesto adds a light freshness and color. Share a pic of the dish on Facebook and hopefully you’ll make a connection with somebody in your life! The chili tastes awful, but they’ll probably appreciate the fact that you’re trying this hard, right? If you choose the righteous path, they will welcome you.
Swiss Chard With Chickpeas and Couscous
Mmm, swiss chard! Kale’s colorful and peppery cousin. With the added protein punch of chickpeas and the exotic, playful starch spheres known as couscous, this meal not only looks amazing…it also tastes fine! You’ll soon start to understand why so many people are going vegan when you’ll find yourself proselytizing to the nonbelievers around you before the last couscous pearl is pecked from the plate. This is who you are now!
Vegan Stir-Fried Garlic Tofu and Eggplant
Who doesn’t love a good stir-fry? Add garlic for a zesty bite while succulent eggplant adds body and texture—not as much as animal meat would, but hey! It’s your lifestyle now. Invite your old bowling league over to try this tasty feast and watch them politely smile with each bite! Veganism is your thing, and you really just needed a thing right now!
Cashew-Cardamom Chia Pudding
The title of this funky vegan breakfast would be enough to turn most people off, but it seems fun to you now that veganism holds dominion over your thoughts and principles! Chia seeds will plump up and absorb the flavors of the more dominant ingredients around them (sort of like your opinions!). Mix up the seeds with some nuts, syrup, and cardamom, throw the amalgam in the fridge, and wake up to something bizarre and challenging! Mmm, Monday morning never tasted so acquired! Can’t wait to share this one with your new Facebook group, “Vegans 4 Pudding”! These are your people.
If you’re feeling emotionally empty and devoid of meaning in your life, the salve for both could be adopting a vegan lifestyle! Try it, and see if you feel something, anything real for the first time in your life!