4 Fun and Flirty Ways to Let Him Know You Clogged His Toilet

We’ve all been there: you’re at a casual, fun party, and you're in the slow slow process of publicizing your budding relationship with your hookup buddy but you don’t know how to make sure every other biddy knows to BACK OFF.  Luckily there’s a quick way to state your ownership like a colonist placing a flag on a patch of land: just place your dainty feminine hand on his body to make sure everyone knows he’s yours! Here are the five best hand placements to claim him with the confidence of a dog marking a fire hydrant:

Even the most experienced woman has clogged a guy’s toilet at some point – but how do you tell him without looking like you’ve just pooped? Here are four tried-and-true methods to let your man know you’ve created a Level 3 State of Emergency in his bathroom:

 

1. If it’s early in the relationship, flee the scene of the crime as quickly and adorably as possible.  Run away giggling with your hands covering your mouth like you make an “oopsie,” and leave without any further explanation. On your way home, send your fella a flirty text saying he should also schedule a “date” with his plumber in the near future. Hopefully, he’ll be so charmed by your quick wit that he won’t even mind the expensive plumbing bills and ruined floor tiles!

 

2. Run to him and nervously tell him you saw Pennywise in his toilet. Men love to feel they are protecting a damsel in distress, and your man will relish the opportunity to rush to your aid in the bathroom. His relief that “It” is actually just a severely clogged toilet and not a carnivorous clown will overshadow his disgust over your backsplash that reached the ceiling. Your hero!

 

 

3. Plan a scavenger hunt by hiding fun little surprises all over his apartment.  Remember: men love the chase. Keep things fresh after making things foul by turning the whole thing into a sexy game. The “big surprise” at the end will be the catastrophe you’ve produced in his bathroom—he’ll never see it coming, even though he’ll been wondering if something died in the attic. Brava, you sneaky little minx!

 

4. Play a little game of Hansel and Gretel. Leave a trail of alphabet cereal from your man to the bathroom door, spelling out your toilet troubles. He’ll be so impressed by your cleverness, he won’t mind that what awaits him is not a house made of candy, but actually a toilet overflowing with a thick, sticky paste that he’ll be sure could not have come from a human woman. Throw in a few marshmallows here and there to make this one sweet surprise!

 

When a gal’s gotta go, she’s gotta go – just make sure you get the plumbing situation in order without losing any cute points!

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