Nothing says ‘holiday season’ like curling up on the couch with your sweetheart and watching a romantic Christmas movie. And nothing says ‘romance’ like a Hallmark film, followed by you flying off the handle at your partner for not meeting those high standards for romance in every film! Here are three Hallmark Channel Christmas films that will cause you to lash out at your significant other for never quite being good enough!
The Christmas Shepherd (2014)
It’s impossible not to hold your partner a little closer when watching this sad tale of a widow, Sally, and her late husband’s German Shepherd, Buddy, who runs away one Christmas. But when you get to the part where Sally tracks down Buddy, who’s been adopted by a widower in Boston, you’ll be pushing your partner away in bitter disgust. Would your boo, who can barely take out the trash, give up the dog he’d taken in to unbreak the heart of a stranger? Would your boo then fall in love with that stranger and move her in with him and his teenage daughter, becoming one big happy family? This movie will have you asking him these rhetorical questions, very loudly and very aggressively. ‘Tis the season!
The Christmas Card (2006)
This movie has everything – a veteran on leave from the army, an attractive small-town 30-something, and a father with a trick up his sleeve. You and your sweetie will love the drama of Faith Spelman who is torn between a handsome new stranger and her commandeering fiancé. But you’ll be throwing a full on temper tantrum when you realize that your boyfriend has never kissed you unexpectedly in the gently falling snow or confessed his love for you on the day you were to marry someone else. All these absurd romantic expectations will leave you reeling and also going off on your boyfriend’s thoughtlessness as if he has ever had any realistic opportunity to do any of those things! Merry Christmas!!
Christmas Under Wraps (2014)
A small town with a secret and DJ Tanner from Full House – what more could you ask for in a holiday romance? This made-for-TV movie fits squarely into the Hallmark Channel formula. Candace Cameron plays Dr. Lauren Brunell, a resident who is forced to move to Alaska to work as a doctor. She falls in love with a local, aptly named Andy Holliday, who’s hiding a secret – his father is actually Santa Claus! Will she stay or will she go? You’ll love their childlike, completely insane romance, and your boyfriend will certainly NOT love the rage you inflict upon him for not being able to achieve that level of fairytale commitment to you. Why can’t his father be Santa Claus? It’s fucked up, really. Enjoy your holiday!
Everyone loves getting cozy with a Christmas movie, especially a rom com with an abjectly unachievable love story! Watch these three if you feel like lashing your at your significant other for not being able to woo you with Christmas magic.