When something is wrong between you and your sweetheart, it can be hard to start the acrimonious conversation that you’ve been waiting for him to initiate all along. No matter how big or small your issues may be, it’s important to make sure that offer the right non-verbal cues to let him be the one to ask, “What’s wrong?”
This classic exhalation of breath is sometimes written as “huff”. As in: she left in a huff, ‘whatever’ she huffed. There’s an implied terseness to it, so play with the length of the breath, tone, musicality and vibration. Done with subtlety, it can lay an unsettling groundwork in his mind. When it’s too audible and aggressive, you may find yourself fighting before you can establish yourself as the victim.
A cousin of the annoyed grunt, “ugh”, this sound ends on a higher note somewhere near the roof of your mouth. Useful for expressing a particular kind of disgust, this is the sound one makes when you find a Band-aid wrapper that missed the trashcan, or when he takes too long in the bathroom. This one comes with a classically domestic undertone, ideal for cohabiting couples who are supposed to know exactly what the other is thinking by now.
Despite the length, the breathiness makes this the most versatile of utterances. Range includes: a response to “lets watch Ken Burns Baseball” to a cavalier way to initiate a breakup. For extra impact, throw your head back and relax your tongue out the side of your mouth to say, “I’m DONE. I’m OVER IT. I HAVE NO WORDS.”
Light and airy with the highest pitch, this is commonly referred to as a whimper. Did he get your dinner order wrong? Forget to pick up paper towels? Bump into you? This is the sound that says, “I’m disappointed and hurt, and you’re the one responsible.” This one increases in effectiveness the more it is utilized, and is an excellent segue into fits of crying.
Drastic times call for drastic measures: this muffled scream can be executed by either turning yourself to be face down in your pillow, or putting the pillow over your face. There is a campy element to this one so choose your timing wisely. Use it sparingly and with full commitment, or your man may think you’re joking.
At the end of the day, it’s the performance of the noise rather than the noise itself that gets him jumping. Try variations on these, combinations of them, or make up your own!